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HomeWrestlingRandom Promo Generator: Ultimate Warrior

Random Promo Generator: Ultimate Warrior


Oh boy did we get some of the best from Ultimate Warrior here:

“Hulk Hogan. Have a question to answer your question. As you, Hulk Hogan, travel to WrestleMania by conventional means, the normal you travel with experience malfunctions. As you realize all that is left is total self destruction, do you, Hulk Hogan, show self pity? Do you, Hulk Hogan, try to reason why? Do you, Hulk Hogan, try and comfort the normals that have even more fear than you? Or do you, Hulk Hogan, kick the doors out? Kick the cockpit door down, take the two pilots that have already made the sacrifice so that you can face this challenge? Dispose of them, Hulk Hogan. Assume the controls, Hulk Hogan. Shove that control into a nosedive, Hulk Hogan. Push yourself to total self destruction. As you realize, Hulk Hogan, you are about to enter a world close to Parts Unknown. Smell it, Warriors. Do you, Hulk Hogan, look for a place to hide? Or do you, Hulk Hogan, face that challenge that may be more powerful than even you are, Hulk Hogan? You, Hulk Hogan, must self destruct so that you will know, Hulk Hogan, who is the chosen one. For Hulk Hogan, I am not the chosen one that you speak of. I am not. I, Hulk Hogan, am the only one.”

He cut this promo in the build up to WrestleMania 6, and it’s just as insane now as it was back in 1990. I’m still not even sure I totally understand it! It seems like he’s talking about Hulk Hogan’s plane malfunctioning on the way to the show and wondering how exactly the Hulkster would handle the realization of his imminent demise, and then saying that a match with him is basically the same thing.

Holy shit, dude!

This has been your graveyard shift blog for the evening. Hope you’re having a good night out there, Cagesiders.

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